Lazy Prey

i feel for the moth
it looks so lost

it just sits on the wall
or tries to fly away
through a closed window


flaps its wings
against the glass

the moth doesn’t know
what’s going on
it just flies
and sees nothing
in its way
it just hangs
it panics
“what sorcery is this?”
it asks

poor moth

a butterfly
but pale
yet beautiful
in a way
like the moon
is beautiful
but hey, it’s no sun

calm down, little moth
be still and hide
in these here parts
bats hunt at night


i know how this will end
dried out
and on its back
a cat toy
until i throw it away
and wash my hands

i’m still not getting up
to let it out
call me lazy
all you want
you want it out
you let it out


stupid moth
be quiet


They Work and Drink

when I grew up
Poles were a thing
hard workers
that drank a lot

they were always alone
no wife
no family
but not really alone
always in small groups
living together
in cheap housing
working and eating
and drinking
and sleeping together

we always said
Poles only work
and drink

drinking those big
half liter cans
of cheap beer

they did work hard

cheap labour
that’s why they were welcome
working the lands
and in the greenhouses
plants and flowers

I remember a hot day
10 of them
on their knees in the dust
between plants
topless white men
bright red backs
I remember thinking
how that was going to hurt
and that they would really
enjoy their beer tonight

no one
really talked to them
and they didn’t talk to us
maybe one of them
spoke some English
he would be the supervisor
just for understanding
some English
no one
really talked to them
we didn’t connect

except the boss

he had a Polish woman
he gave her a trailer
on the back of his land

she was skinny
and petite
he was fat
and big and unhealthy
and smoked cigars

she worked in the sun too
and I just thought
how it was going to hurt
at night
when that sweaty pig
would fuck her

in the trailer
on the back of his land

Did I?

did I lock the door?
yes, I did
but to be sure
do it again

walk to the car
unlock the doors
Audi lights
so moving leds
Knight Rider style
but not the voice
no “hello, Michael”
but close enough

Audi A4 Avant
Ultra Sport S-Line
dark grey
all black details
and shaded glass
custom rims
I’d fucking sell my wife
to keep it

did I lock the door?
yes, I did
never forgot
always do
i’m sure I did
do it again

sit in the car
black leather, soft
let’s just go
get out of here
just trust yourself
or just ignore
it’s what the damn
alarm is for

did I lock the door?
yes, I did
i’m sure of it
but best be sure

driving off
two liter roar
I need a fast car
to save myself
a getaway
my mind the thug
a murder weapon

I locked the door
I’m sure I did
I locked the door
I’m sure
I’m sure
I’m sure?

it’s like
my momma used to say
I would forget my head
if it wasn’t attached
to my neck

I forgot why
but admitting she is right
feels wrong

Magnolia Never More

the magnolia branch
is blooming
it has been
for over a week now
and it will
for another

one after one
furry buds open
they blossom
show their purple
and the white inside

and one after one after one
and way too quick
petals lose their shine
and start to hang


one day bloom
one day hang
one day fall

I clean them up
the dried out petals
of the magnolia branch

I hear them falling
one after one after one
during the day


this was supposed to be
a happy thing
a blooming branch
flowers on wood
like spring
but inside


never has death
overcome new life
so quickly
and so definitively

this was supposed to be
a happy thing



Live, Love, Laugh (Metal Edition)

a piece of metal
about yay big
is lodged inside
deep in the brain
it weighs down
it scars and tears
a piece of metal
of purest pain

it feels so heavy
some days at least
and poisonous
like high-grade lead
it’s always there
a piece of metal
inside of you
a blue, dull sad

fight the feeling
fight, you must
this piece of metal
so sharp and cold
dance and run
live, love, laugh
heat up the oven
turn lead to gold

Dialog Between Willy & His Brother

“I wish he would just die.”

“You don’t just wish for someone to die, Willy. You never do that. You know what happens if you wish someone would die and then they actually die?”

“Dunno, what would happen?”

“Well… a lot can happen, obviously. But none of them good, Willy, none of them good. Perhaps you feel guilty. Maybe, just maybe, you’d start believing they actually died because you wished it, Willy. You’d feel pretty bad, I can tell you that. Or maybe someone overheard you wishing, Willy. Ever thought about that? They’d call the police on you. Saying how they heard you wishing they would die and that you probably killed them yourself. You’d be a murder suspect just like that, Willy.”

“I wouldn’t like that at all.”

“Of course not, Willy, no one would. You know what you should do? Wish they would get something bad, but really, really unlikely. Or something to happen to them. Like, really bad, but very unlikely. That way if it happens, at least you could go on believing you have a super power or something. Or if anyone overheard you, they’d never mess with you again because they would think you might put a deadly magic sickness spell on them or something.”

“So, an illness then?”

“Well, not a cold or something, or a flu. No, something special and painful. And they would die in the end. Gruesome.”

“Like polio?”

“Polio could work, but I dunno how painful that is. I mean, do you die from polio? Don’t know. No, wish ’em something they’d die from for sure. Like a snake bite. Or malaria.”

“We’re in England. No deadly snakes here. Or malarias.”

“I know. But I said ‘unlikely’, remember? Can you imagine how afraid people would be of you if you wished a for a snake bite and then they would be bitten and they would just slowly die and be in pain for days? No one would be calling you Willy anymore, that’s for sure. They’d call you Will or William or sir or something. Respect you.”

“You call me Willy too, like, all the time.”

“That’s because you’re my little brother. I can call you whatever I want. And your snake bite trick won’t work on me, now would it?”

“No, guess not. Mum’s late. I hope we can have pizza for dinner. You know, because we are late because of her. I love pizza.”